How old are you?

I was born with the world’s most unbelievable, fake ID birthday of 02/20/2000 in Phoenixville, Pennsylvania. Pisces.

$25

Where did you go to school?

I’m still in school. I’m going to be in school forever. My pursuit of becoming a professor just entails school. Then more school. One day, once I’m all educated up and done being in school, I will work at one. And still be in school.

$2035

What does Mary order?

Falafel with Hot Sauce, a side order of Baba Ganoush, and a Seltzer, please? Hold the toothpick.

$5